I need you to feel safe. I need you to let go of your wants and desires, and know that I will to do what is best for you, when you give up control.
I need your trust. I don’t expect you to give it blindly – I expect to earn it. But without trust, you cannot surrender. Without surrender, you cannot grow.
I need you to feel secure. I need you to know that I’m not going to break your self-image without making sure that I build it back up stronger than before.
I need you to accept comfort. Sometimes you may crumble. I will be there to pick up the pieces, and to pet you as we continue on.
I need you to tell me about your weaknesses or brokenness. If you have triggers or fears, I need to know about them, to avoid them, or help you dispose of them.
I need your honesty. As our relationship grows, I need to know where your mind is going.
I need you to expect consistency. You are going to get the same reactions, expectations, and boundaries today that you got yesterday, or a year before.
I need you to accept gentleness. Sometimes I’m a sadist, and I do that quite well, but at the end of the day it is often more important to me to cover you in tender kisses, or run my hands gently across your soft skin.
I need you to relinquish control. I need you to give it up willingly, and to allow me to coax it away from you when you can’t. Giving up control is a voluntary choice: Ultimately, you will either make that choice, or you won’t.
I need you to accept praise. In order to accept praise, you must first accept that you are worthy of receiving it. It is my job to provide praise when you deserve it. It is your job to to believe it.
I need you to accept complements. If your self-image causes you to argue and evade when I tell you that you are beautiful, then you are simply negating the statements of someone who likes you enough to find you so, so that you can wallow in the fact that no one is found beautiful by everyone.
I need you to let go of your inhibitions. They are holding you back from understanding your true self, and holding you back from your submission. It’s time to embrace sex as the dirty, sweaty, sticky thing that it is. I can lead you to freedom and experiences you’ve never imagined …but I can’t carry you there kicking and screaming.
I need you to need to learn and grow. Education, learning, and the ability to think clearly are very important to me. Learning never stops. If you don’t believe this, we’re not going to get along for long.
I need you to to accept being challenged. I do not expect to have a relationship with a passive person, I expect to have a relationship with a strong assertive person. I need you to stand toe to toe with me, because I expect you to be stronger after you interact with me, than before you met me.
I need you to surrender. Though I will lead you, I will never force you. I need you to come along willingly… or not go at all.